Meet Our May ‘21 Woman Crush: Chane’t Mottern
This Mother's Day and all month long we're recognizing my amazing friend Chanet. She is a single mother to the most adorable little boy, Isaiah. I remember telling her while she was pregnant, he would look just like her and 9 months later, I was right, they're twins! Chanet is the ultimate Super Mom, she owns her own business in San Diego helping women look and feel their most beautiful and she has the most gentle soul. This month we are learning more about her, her journey, and how she is navigating through this thing called life as a business owner and single mother.
Tell us a little bit about yourself!
My name is Chanet I am 31 years young. I have a son who is 4. I have been a single mom since the day he was born! I own my own small beauty studio in downtown San Diego.
What has your single life taught you?
Wow what has Single life has taught me. It has taught me to live with myself and really get to know who I am. I feel like sometimes we stay in or get into relationships to subconsciously distract ourselves from ourselves. Gives us an excuse to why we didn’t or aren’t doing something but at the end of the day it’s no ones fault but our own. We don’t work on ourselves and better ourselves fully when immersed in a relationship. Some may think one can, but you truly don’t realize how little you focus on you, until it’s only you.
What are some of the things that you want to accomplish during this season?
Well I have been fully single for over for about 2 and half years and I set goals for my self to travel, open my own business, focus on my mental wellness and physical health. I have since traveled to Ireland, Holland, The UK and Paris, France. I have learned to be more present and focused on the now, which in turn has made me a better mother and business owner.
How do you deal with the frustrations during this season?
Hmmm...frustrations and are there many. I would say the biggest one is sexual frustrations sometimes I just want to find a man to get that out and then I remember, how detrimental that has been to my mental health and I have worked so hard to develop the strength mentally I have now. I have to take a moment and re think everything, maybe masturbate to release that energy. The next would be the frustrations of being alone, feeling like I don’t have a partner to pick up the slack or help me when I don’t know where to take my car for an alignment. It’s one thing you say you want to be an independent woman and then to actually be one. It can be extremely exhausting to have to literally do everything on your own. I have jumped started my own car; changed a flat tire, not to say only a man should do these things I just want sometimes the option not too. I mean don’t get me wrong I’m one bad ass chick but shit I’m tired. I can't say there is a true answer to handle all these frustrations I just do my best each day, one moment at a time.
How do you practice self love?
How do I practice self love; That’s hard the true answer is I don’t. I run a business full time and a full time mother to a toddler. There is no time for self love. However last year has really taught me something that I need to say NO wayyyy more! So my new form of self love is to say no and take it easy sometimes. More recently I’ve started to take bubble baths and morning walks alone while listening to self development books.
How do you handle stress?
I have not been good at handling stress my mind goes to the worse case every time. It’s a daily struggle but I have recently read the book The Power of Now and wow was that life changing. Read it I promise it will change everything for you. I literally live my life by the minute now no longer living in the past or the future just right now what’s happening this very second and if it’s something upsetting taking the next second to figure out a solution.
What advice would you give single women ?
My advice to you if you are struggling at this moment is find why. Write it down and then figure out if it’s productive to be so focused on the struggle and maybe a better mindset would be to focus on the solution. Make a list of what you want for you and then go get it!
Follow Chanet and her business Transformation Beauty
